The WiFi Password Issue
by anna-garny
Summary: Every month it was the same... Sheldon changed the Wi-Fi password and Penny had to practically grovel to get the new one. M for some swearing and mention of adult situations in later chapters.


**This is set about mid-October 2011, about the time that the first Avengers trailer came out. Penny, based on my observations, has become a bit of a geek-girl. I'm also pretending that the last episode of Season 4 never happened, she never 'almost' slept with Raj, Priya is still in the country, Amy is still her 'bestie', Howard and Bernadette are still engaged to be married and Sheldon is, well... Sheldon. basically it's near-the-end-of-Season-4 canon. I'm pretending I haven't seen Season 5.**

Penny considered the options, and realized that she my have to concede defeat in this instance.

God-dammit, she hated knuckling under to Sheldon, but she really wanted to see the Avengers movie trailer, and Sheldon had changed the wi-fi password.

Again.

She'd tried all the thinly veiled insults she could think of 'pennyneedsherownwifi' 'pennystopbeingafreeloader' 'cooperhofstadterresidenceonly' 'stopstealingourwifipenny'. Nothing had worked.

It was all Robert Downey Jr.'s fault – being so charming and suave in the first Iron Man movie, sucking her into seeing it after Leonard had showed her the trailer online and then, of course, the sequel. Scarlett Johansson had kicked some serious butt in that movie - it was almost enough to make Penny want to take self-defence classes, but she'd settled for some basic stunt work through her acting school. Then that gorgeous Hemsworth boy had been in Thor, and she'd actually volunteered to go see Chris Evans as Captain America; she'd even been happy to sit through Sheldon's hunt for the acoustic sweet-spot in the theatre for that one.

It had taken almost four years, but she was turning into a bit of a geek. Not that she minded – some of the sci-fi shows that the guys watched were actually pretty good. Sheldon had subjected her to a synopsis of the pilot episode of Firefly one laundry night, and offered to watch the start of the series with her the following Thursday – it was 'anything can happen' Thursday, so the other three were out on the town, well, Howard was out with Bernadette while Raj was tagging along with his sister and Leonard to a bar somewhere in Hollywood.

Somehow, after loving the pilot episode and discovering that the guy behind it was the same man who had given her Buffy, she'd convinced him to loan her his boxed DVD set of the series, and the movie sequel. Yes, she'd been forced to sign a two-page document regarding the care, handling and storage of the DVD's, but it had been worth it. Since then she'd gotten into a few of the less intense comic-book series, re-watched the X-Men movies and decided that they weren't too bad. Somehow when Leonard had made her watch them he'd sucked all the fun out of it, commenting on changes made between the movies and the comic books every few minutes. Watching them with Sheldon, or alone, meant that she really appreciated the story, not to mention the shirtless Hugh Jackman. Sheldon seemed to know something that Leonard had never been able to learn - when a person is seeing a movie for the first time, it's best to let them do so without interrupting. He saved the 'Sheldon commentary' for repeat viewings.

Then, when she found out that the man behind Buffy and Firefly was directing the Avengers movie, she'd actually gotten excited.

Heck, she was even thinking of going to ComicCon next year.

Voluntarily.

Maybe even wearing a costume. Not something obvious, but something that could be disguised as everyday wear. Maybe a dress like that one Summer Glau had worn in the Serenity movie...

But right now what she needed was the wi-fi password so she could watch the Avengers trailer. She paused, fingers poised over the keyboard, and considered what else Sheldon might have selected for a password. She'd give herself five more minutes before she sent Leonard a text... but no. Leonard was staying at Raj and Priya's place tonight. If she sent him a text message Priya would go off the deep end and then she'd feel guilty. She'd have to ask Sheldon.

Knock, knock, knock.

"Penny."

Her head whipped up from the login screen, she'd tried a few more combinations but nothing had worked to get her online, yet. Now here presented himself the answer to her problem. Either that or he had some way of knowing when she was trying to hack into their network - she wouldn't put it past him to have installed something that would let him do that.

Knock, knock, knock.

"Penny."

She got to her feet and set the laptop down on the clear section of couch she'd just vacated, crossing the small room but waiting until he finished his little ritual before opening the door.

Knock, knock, knock.

"Penny."

"Hi, Sheldon."

"Hello, Penny."

"What's up?"

"Why do people use that term? How is an objects' relative position in space reflective of my reason for visiting you? How can you even give the term 'what' a position, be it vertical or horizontal-"

Penny sighed, and asked the question properly before Sheldon could build up to a proper rant.

"What do you want, Sheldon?"

He stopped ranting, narrowed his eyes at her for a moment, then answered.

"I thought you might want the new wi-fi password."

"Really?" she was more than a little incredulous. Every other month when he had changed it he made her march over there and extract it from him like blood from a stone. Or get it from Leonard in a moment of weakness.

"Yes. I just watched the trailer for the new Avengers movie and since you expressed an interest in it after the conclusion of Captain America I thought you might like to see it, too."

"Oh. Well, thank-you, Sheldon."

"Where is your computer?"

"Uh, on the sofa."

"May I come in?"

"Sure." She stepped back from the door and allowed the lanky physicist to step past her, ignoring the sharp intake of breath at the state of her apartment.

So, she hadn't cleaned up in a while. She was allowed to be a bit depressed; her ex was dating a gorgeous, exotic, educated woman, her acting career still hadn't done anything except cost her money and she'd barely managed to get enough shifts at the Cheesecake Factory to cover her rent this month. No wonder she stole food from the boys whenever she got the chance - leftovers from the restaurant only got a girl so far.

"Penny, did you lose the organizational charts that I made for you?"

"Yes." Honesty was always the best policy when it came to Sheldon and cleaning.

"Is it possible that they are buried somewhere in the detritus of this apartment?"

"It's more than possible, it's downright probable." Penny told him, closing the door and walking around the couch, stepping over a basket of laundry - clean? dirty? who cared? - and opening the refrigerator, taking out two bottles of water and returning to the couch as Sheldon hovered, seeming unwilling to sit.

She handed him a drink and collapsed onto the emptier part of the seat, closing her eyes momentarily as she felt something hard beneath her and then heard a snap.

"What was that?" Sheldon demanded, jumping away from her and almost dropping his bottle of water.

"A coat-hanger. Can you get me online?"

"Why is there a coat-hanger on your couch?"

"Because it was attached to a dress that I bought myself and I put it there when I tried the dress on."

"Why?"

"Because I couldn't wear the dress with a coat-hanger still holding it." For a genius, Sheldon sure had his dumb moments.

"No, I mean why didn't you dispose of the coat-hanger when you disposed of the rest of the packaging the dress came in?"

"Because the rest of the packaging the dress came in is there." She pointed with one toe at a black paper bag with rope handles and white tissue paper sticking out of the top, half-crumpled up beneath her coffee table.

"Penny, you can't live like this."

"Why not? I've been living like this for four years."

"No, you haven't. When you and Leonard were engaged in that pointless relationship this place was almost presentable. In fact, for a few months after that relationship reached its' inevitable ending your apartment was very tidy."

"Well, maybe I just don't feel like cleaning, lately."

"May I ask why not?"

"I just don't."

Sheldon was still standing between her coffee table and couch, and still hadn't given her the wi-fi password. Penny was beginning to get annoyed.

"Would you like me to?"

"What?" That broke her from the stupor.

"Would you like me to clean your apartment?"

"Sheldon, you can't do that."

"Well, actually, I can. We still have the spare key to your apartment, it's in the bowl."

"Okay then, do you remember what happened last time you cleaned my apartment?"

"Penny, I have an eidetic memory, I remember very clearly that you were upset. You even threatened me with a shoe."

"Exactly."

"Yes, but this time I'm asking permission, and I'd be cleaning during the day, while you were at work, rather than while you were sleeping."

"What?"

"I have one hour of free time allotted on Tuesdays after work, before we come to the Cheesecake Factory for our dinner at six-thirty. I also have three hours free on Sunday mornings after Dr Who. I usually spend the Tuesday free time checking the cataloguing of my comic books, but, as I also do that after we return from the comic book store on Wednesdays, I'd be happy to forego it once a week if I could help alleviate... this." He managed to encompass the entire mess that was Penny's apartment (and life) with a sweep of his arm as he finished his little speech.

"Oh, honey, I don't know..."

"Penny, it would make your life easier and would help me sleep better at night. I can't stand the thought that untidiness of this level is adjacent to the same hallway as my living space."

"Well..."

"And Amy mentioned the other day that she felt you were beginning to exhibit signs of depression. Surely a neat and tidy living space would help offset that?"

Penny felt her resolve weaken.

"Okay, but only if you let me make you dinner on Saturdays as a thank-you."

"Before or after laundry?"

"Before, of course. You can bring your laundry over here and sort it while I make spaghetti with hot-dog slices, salad and garlic bread."

Sheldon considered this for a moment, before nodding.

"I can accept those terms - your spaghetti is almost as good as my mothers and your laundry is in need of organizing, as well."

Penny felt herself blush involuntarily - Mary Cooper's cooking was not something to be trifled with - as she nodded at Sheldon, too.

"Great. Can I watch the Avengers trailer, now?"

"Actually, I have some free time this evening as Wolowitz is on a date with Bernadette, Leonard is with Rajesh and his sister and I've already had my dinner. I could make a start on the cleaning if you'd like."

"Sheldon-"

"Here." He picked up her laptop and entered the password with one hand, keystrokes so fast she couldn't follow the words he entered. "You may go into my apartment and watch the trailer. If you would like, we also have a blu-ray of the movie Thor. It is on my desk, and you may watch the special features while I tidy up a little here."

"Sheldon, I don't know..."

"Have you had dinner?"

"Yes..." Penny neglected to mention that her 'dinner' had been half a packet of potato chips and a large glass of very cheap wine, but that still counted, right?

"Then I'll be able to join you back in my apartment in forty minutes - most of the television shows that I watch are currently on hiatus so I was planning on watching Thor this evening. I already watched the special features, there's thirty minutes' worth, so if you watch the Avengers trailer, then the special features, by the time you use the bathroom and steal a yoghurt from my refrigerator I will be able to join you, and the movie will finish at twenty minutes past nine, which is a reasonable fluctuation in bedtime for a Friday night."

Penny was too tired, too grateful at the prospect of her apartment being tidied, to even bother arguing with him. She took the proffered laptop from her tall neighbor and exited her apartment, snagging the 'emergency' key to the boys' place from its' hook (the one Sheldon had installed after he'd been forced to spend the night) and entering Sheldon and Leonard's living room, settling in the centre of the couch and finding the movie trailer she wanted to watch.

When Sheldon came back into his apartment just over an hour later (he'd managed to get sidetracked alphabetizing Penny's DVD collection) he found his blonde neighbor asleep, slumped over his spot. She wasn't actually touching the sacrosanct cushion, instead she was slumped over to her left, head resting on the arm of the sofa and the main menu of the Blu-ray was on a loop at low volume.

He smiled, a small quirk of his lips that would be denied if anyone questioned him about it, and picked up the remote control. Apparently he'd have to delay Thor for the moment – he pressed the stop button and turned the TV off.

After a moments' consideration, he took a cushion off Leonards' linen chair and slid it under Penny's head, pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and draped it over her. He wasn't happy about having an unannounced, unexpected house-guest, but his mother had drilled into him that he was to be nicer to Penny, and making someone comfortable surely counted as nice. That and he knew that he was likely to be assaulted if he dared wake Penny from her slumber.

It didn't take long for her to shift, grasping the pillow and sighing as she dropped into a deeper part of her sleep cycle. Sheldon nodded approvingly and went into his bedroom, deciding that his comic book collection could do with another re-shuffle before bedtime.


End file.
